the most amazing night of my life..
tonight has to be the best night of my entire life... my beautiful girl Emily did her first art show and sold an amazing amount of prints, which totally impressed the hell out of me.. she's so amazingly talented and it was wonderful to see the public response to her amazing art.. its always nice to have others that give you the power to see your love through their eyes, like its the first time..
brandon and I did a wonderful acoustic show that showcased our own material and a number of covers we made our own.. not really sure if most of the audience was even aware that some songs were covers..heheh Brandon and I spent the past week practicing for about four hours every day and we have created such a musical psychic link that we were able to be completely in tune with one another.. his harmonies and backup vocals have grown to a level that it not only impressed the shit out of me but caused a number of people in our audience to compliment us on how great our harmonies were. We didn't play everything perfect, but we played it together and I really felt that the music we played caused an impact in our audience and gave us a taste of how good we can be.. my voice lessons have definately raised me to a new level... I know that in my past bands I really did go out of key at times, as much as I denied it.. now I can be very confident that I can actually feel the sensations in the body that lets me know I'm hitting my notes perfectly.. so I'm very proud of our performance and yet feel like it was the first step to an amazing journey for us as musicians and performers..
and.. most importantly .. as I finished our cover of "If it be your Will" by Leonard Cohen, a song that held a huge place in my Emily's heart.. that in her young fantasies imagined getting played at her wedding... after singing that last note.. I told her that she was the love of my life, that I wanted to be with her forever, and going on one bended knee.. I asked her if she would marry me.. and she said yes...
for the longest time i swore I'd never get married again.. shit, for almost three years I wouldn't even commit to be someone's boyfriend.. yet her.. this one.. is so the most perfect, amazing, beautiful woman I've ever known.. we are compatible in ways that I wouldn't even hope for.. that I never expected to find in another..
and in the year we've been together.. I honestly have not experienced any red flags, warning signs.. I've just grown to love this woman more and more, deeper and deeper.. sometimes I've wondered if I've ever really loved anyone before, as this feels so different, so new, so amazing..
so, despite my past life, despite my cynicism, despite my fears.. I'm going to marry this girl.. I'm going to marry my best friend, my lover, and now my fiance..
and I'll never, ever let her go.. she's my muse.. my happiness... for the first time in my life, there is someone who inspires me to care more about her happiness than my own, which is not entirely true, as her happiness is what makes me truly happy.. so in a sense, its quite selfish to consciously strive to make her life amazing.. because when she smiles, when she glows.. I feel like I'm living the most beautiful amazing life ever.. more than I had ever hoped for..
I'm luck, I'm happy, I thank whatever divinity is.. that in all the years of heartbreak and betrayal, of cynicism and bitterness.. somehow I managed to keep that fire of romanticism alive.. even if it was sheltered, hidden, unrecognized.. it still lived.. it didn't die..
and now it burns, a flaming fire of passion and romance and nurturance.. of mutual inspiration.. we truly make one another greater by our love.. i feel like i've become such a different person, so much more of a GOOD person, a person that I don't think I ever could have become without her, without this..
she's my dream girl, and I'm gonna marry her..
(it will probably be a long engagement as she really shouldn't have to plan a wedding while going for her college degree)
i have to say.. ever since we started this amazing romance.. I have felt like every day is a blessing, I am so thankful and appreciative of my entire life.. every single day I thank my inner angel, and I thank her .. and the divinity we have created..
this, she, us... it changed my life.. it changed me.. and it is the most powerful, amazing magick i've ever seen..
hope you can share some of this happiness with me, and I sincerely hope everyone of you can experience this as well..
I am,
jonathan facile.. the fiance of Emily Bein

rock!
p.s. thank you Emily, thank you Brandon, Cristos, Rin, Tiffany, Sterling, Bella (MOM!!) and Andy, and Michelle (even though!) and Gina and Robie and Simon and Kiah and everyone who came out tonight.. your all my Family and I love your presence in my life.. your part of what makes my life amazing..

p.s.s I REALLY thank you Andy for giving me your blessing to marry your beautiful Daughter..